


Anymore

by TheTruthBetweenRPF (TheTruthBetween)



Category: Star Trek: Voyager RPF
Genre: BDSM, Dark, Domestic Violence, Dubious Consent, F/F, Implied or Off-stage Rape/Non-con, Infidelity, Non Consensual, Rape/Non-con References, Sex Toys, Sexual Abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2004-09-08
Updated: 2012-05-02
Packaged: 2017-11-04 17:01:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 6
Words: 9,257
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/396138
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheTruthBetween/pseuds/TheTruthBetweenRPF
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Inspired by 'I Don’t Know You Anymore' by Darren Hayes</p><p>I have no idea where Kate's hubby is in any of this story</p>
    </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by 'I Don’t Know You Anymore' by Darren Hayes
> 
> I have no idea where Kate's hubby is in any of this story

Kate picked up the phone beside her on the second ring. "Hello?"

There was a slight pause. "Kate?"

"Yes?" Kate furrowed her brow, trying to place the familiar sounding voice.

"It's Lynn."

The book Kate was holding dropped to the couch, then bounced off to the floor as Kate held onto the receiver with both hands. "Lynn?"

"I wasn't sure if I should call, but..." the young woman on the other end sighed. "Could I come over? Visit for a while? I just... things are really crazy right now, and I need to get away, and..." She sighed again. "I just need to get out of the city, and I thought of you. I figured maybe we could talk."

"Talk?" Kate asked, her voice almost derisive. "Talk."

"Yeah," Lynn replied, after another, longer pause. Quieter, "Talk."

Kate lifted an eyebrow. "About?"

"I don't know. Anything. It doesn't really matter."

"All right. You know where I live." Without waiting for a reply, Kate hung up the phone.

Here. Lynn was coming here.

The thought boggled Kate's mind. The young beauty had been at her house before, years ago. A chance meeting, eyes met across a room, nights spent wrapped in passion and each other's arms. A fight, about nothing, really, and the ever-lasting vision of blonde hair trailing in a quick, furious departure. Lynn left.

Kate still carried resentment, although after so long she was honesty unsure if the resentment was toward Lynn, or herself.

***

Lynn took a quick breath when she saw Kate for the first time in years. "Hi," she whispered.

"Hi," Kate replied, trying to keep her voice flat, but not entirely succeeding. She opened the door wider to allow Lynn to pass.

Lynn entered the house, looking around. "Looks nice," she commented.

"It looks the same as the last time you were here."

Lynn looked over at the older woman. "Not quite." She pointed to a picture on the wall. "The frame is different." Another picture. "That one wasn't here before. Neither were those two." She peaked her head around a corner. "You have new furniture."

Kate blushed slightly.

"What?"

She cleared her throat. "There were strawberry stains on the couch."

"Oh."

~*~

"I have an idea!"

Kate chuckled, regarding her young lover with a sort of fond indulgence. "Yes?"

Lynn gave Kate a sultry look. "Give me a minute." She got up from the couch and made her way to the kitchen.

Kate admired the view of her bare rear as she walked. "I'm getting a few ideas of my own."

"Hellcat," Lynn teased, glancing over her shoulder and seeing the look on Kate's face. She was grinning when she turned the corner into the kitchen.

"Yesssss," Kate heard Lynn gloat.

"Find something?" the older woman asked.

"Everything."

A moment later, Lynn walked back into the living room, carrying a bowl of strawberries and a can of whipped cream.

Kate raised an eyebrow. "I was preparing those for freezing, you know."

Lynn shrugged, eying the quartered fruit. "Too bad."

***

"Oh God!" Kate cried breathlessly.

Lynn glanced up, carefully setting down the can of whipped cream, before devouring the whipped cream covered area between Kate's thighs. Once the whipped cream was gone, instead of pulling back like the last three times she'd done this, Lynn trapped Kate's clit between her lips, sucking on the nub and brushing her tongue over the tip, sending Kate immediately into orgasm.

When the older woman's body finally calmed to minor shudders, Lynn pulled back, balancing over Kate and kissing her gently. "I love seeing you like this," she whispered, running her hand down Kate's side.

"Mm, I love it when you make me like this," Kate responded huskily.

Lynn chuckled, then grew serious, her own arousal rushing through her veins like wildfire. "Touch me, Kate."

Kate wrapped her arms loosely around Lynn's neck. "Tell me what you want," she invited, leaning her head up to nibble lightly on the younger woman's throat.

"Mmmm," Lynn moaned. "I want you... now."

"Say it," Kate whispered, moving her mouth directly in front of Lynn's ear.

Lynn felt a shiver of excitement skitter up her spine. "Take me."

"Mm-mm-mm," Kate objected softly. "Say it."

Lynn turned her head slightly and whispered into Kate's ear, " _Fuck_ me."

Kate moaned, and ran one hand down Lynn's body, following an unerring line down between her thighs and into the wet heat that awaited her. Knowing by now what the blonde would want, Kate immediately thrust three fingers into her, feeling the silky muscles clench around her fingers, then relax, Lynn rocking into the caress.

Setting a quick rhythm, Kate brushed her thumb over Lynn's clit, making her shudder and moan.

"Oh God yes... oh Kate... Mm, please..."

"Say it again, darling... Say it for me and I'll make you come."

Lynn gasped. "Oh yes... Kate... oh God, fuck me!"

Almost growling, Kate nipped harder at the skin of Lynn's throat and sped up the motion of her fingers, feeling Lynn shudder and tremble, close to climax. "Now, Lynn... come for me, darling, come for me now."

"Yes!" Lynn shouted, arching, her head back, eyes closed. "Oh God, Kate, YES!" As her orgasm came crashing down around her, sweeping her up in its flood, Lynn let out an incoherent scream, followed by a sob, before her body relaxed against Kate.

***

"It's not gonna come out," Lynn said, trying to hold in her laughter.

Kate stood beside the couch, looking down at the now pink fabric in dismay, a wet cloth in one hand and fabric cleaner in the other. "It's not funny," she growled, turning to glare at her lover.

Lynn lost her battle for control, erupting into howls of laughter, Kate finally joining her, the two clutching each other and holding each other up.

*~*

"It looks good," Lynn noted softly, pulling Kate from memories of passions passed.

"Thanks."

They stood in stilted silence for a moment, before Lynn brought one hand to her stomach, and the other up to quickly rub at her temple. "Could I have something to drink, please? I'm feeling a little dizzy."

Kate stood, stock still, staring at Lynn's hand... specifically the simple gold and diamond ring adorning it.

"Kate?"

"Mm?" Kate jerked her head up slightly, focusing on Lynn's face. "Oh. A drink, of course." The older woman led the way to the kitchen and poured Lynn a glass of apple juice.

"Thank you," Lynn said softly as she accepted the glass. She looked out the window. "You put a porch swing up." She glanced over her shoulder at Kate. "It looks nice."

Kate nodded. "Would you like to sit outside?"

Lynn smiled, momentarily paralyzing Kate. "Sure."

The two went out the kitchen door onto the back porch and sat side by side on the swing, Lynn slowly sipping at her juice. Finally Kate asked, "What are you doing here, Lynn?"

Lynn sighed. "I don't know. I just... like I said on the phone, everything's crazy right now, I needed to get away, and I just thought of you. Maybe... maybe I shouldn't have called, shouldn't have come here, but..." She sighed again. "Things ended really badly last time we saw each other. I hate it when that happens with anyone, so I figured that, well... someone had to be the first to let go, right?"

"Makes sense," Kate said evenly.

Lynn let out a hard sigh. "Can you just _pretend_ that you've forgiven me? Just for a while, please?"

Kate tucked a piece of hair behind her ear. "I'm not angry with you, Lynn. I don't hold a grudge that long."

"Then what's so different?" Lynn set down her glass and turned slightly to face Kate, meeting her gaze directly. "Have you really changed so much since I last saw you that your general disposition is one of disapproval and anger?"

Kate glanced down, picking at her nails. "People change."

"Too much." Lynn reached out slightly, to touch Kate's jaw, but pulled back before her fingers made purchase. "I don't know you anymore," she whispered.

"Somehow I doubt I'm the only one who's changed," Kate noted, looking up again. She grabbed Lynn's left hand, displaying the rings there. "When I knew you, you were carefree. You didn't want to get married to anyone." She paused, dropped the soft hand. "Now you are."

Heart beating quicker now, from the feel of Kate's skin against hers, and nervousness for her next words, Lynn blurted, "I'm pregnant."

Kate's eyes widened slightly. "What?" she asked faintly.

It was Lynn's turn now to look down at her hands and pick at her nails. "Four months. The due date is mid-August."

"Congratulations."

Lynn didn't reply.

"Are you all right?"

Lynn let out a sort laugh, barely anything more than an expultion of air, and shook her head slightly, still looking down. She raised her head, allowing Kate to see the tears in her eyes. "I never wanted a child. Not now, anyway. Kate, I'm 26 years old. I've been married for less than three years. And now I'm pregnant. Don't get me wrong, I love my baby, and I love being pregnant, but..."

"It's not how you hoped it would be."

Lynn nodded.

"And you feel bad for feeling how you do."

Another nod.

"You wish it was different, but don't feel you have the right to think that."

"Yeah."

"I've felt that way a lot lately."

"About what?"

Kate looked into Lynn's eyes, studying, speaking, searching. "You."


	2. Chapter 2

Lynn stood in the doorway, watching Kate putter around the kitchen, putting glasses away, washing dishes that already seemed clean, rearranging items in the fridge.

"Kate."

The older woman ignored the call, carefully not looking at the blonde. Lynn quickly walked over to Kate and grabbed her by the wrist, swinging her around.

"Let go of me," Kate growled low, glaring up at Lynn.

Lynn saw the fear lurking deep in the blue-grey eyes. "If I drop my hand, if I stop touching your skin... will you then be free of me?" Lynn asked quietly.

Kate jerked away. "Get out."

"No."

The glare intensified. "You've overstayed your welcome, Lynn. Now get the hell out."

"Lynn isn't here!"

Kate blinked. "Excuse me?"

Lynn gritted her teeth, focusing a laser gaze on Kate. "Lynn Zimmerman walked out of this house four years ago. She never came back. I'm not that girl anymore, Kate. I'm a woman, I'm married, I'm having a baby, I'm getting my life together, I'm not playing around. I'm not Lynn anymore."

"So who are you?" Mocking.

Lynn lifted her chin slightly. "Jeri. Jeri Ryan."

"Well, _Jeri_... get out."

"No."

Kate could feel her blood start to simmer, a slow, hot burn, making its way through her veins. Lynn -- Jeri -- took a step forward, then another as Kate stepped back, until Kate was leaning against the counter, Jeri right in front of her, so close their breasts brushed together with each synchronous breath.

Her voice low, Jeri said quietly, "I'm not going to leave because I know that you're scared, Kate. What are you afraid of? Me? Are you afraid because you still want me? Are you afraid that I might still want you? You're afraid when I touch you, I see it in your eyes. Why is that, Kate?"

"You bitch," Kate breathed.

Jeri leaned forward, her lips brushing against Kate's earlobe as she whispered. "If you're going to use profanity, shouldn't you change that? If I'm a bitch, it's only as yours."

Kate jerked her head back, shocked eyes meeting Jeri's desire-darkened gaze. "What?"

"If I'm a bitch, I'm your bitch." She lowered her voice again. "No one has ever touched me the way you have, Kate. No one." She paused, then whispered, "Touch me now, Kate."

"I..."

Jeri continued. "Touch me like you did... touch me like you still want me. I know you do."

"Oh God, yes."

"Then fuck me," Jeri growled. "Fuck me like you need me."

Letting out a helpless moan of desire, Kate pushed forward, shoving Jeri back into the opposite counter and motioning for her to sit. When the taller woman was seated on the edge of the counter, Kate attacked her neck, kissing and biting, her passions stirred to a fever pitch.

Jeri's shirt was ripped as it was pulled off, and the button came off her pants when they were yanked down. Her bra clasp broke and her panties were torn clean away in the face of Kate's passionate assault.

As soon as the path was clear, Kate trailed down Jeri's body, kissing, nipping and licking down the smooth skin until she reached Jeri's erect nipples, then paused for a while, enjoying the hardened nubs.

Jeri's finger twined in Kate's hair, pulling her closer to her body. "Oh God, Kate," she moaned, her back arching forward, head resting back against the cupboard. "God, Kate, touch me, please... I'm going crazy, I need you."

Kate slid one hand down Jeri's stomach, feeling the muscles contract sharply, then relax at the touch. When her fingers reached the wet folds, she growled, "You're so wet," against Jeri's nipple.

"Oh yes," Jeri breathed. She leaned her head forward to speak directly into Kate's ear. "You make me more wet than anyone ever has. You make me drip." Her voice lowered to a sensual whisper. "Taste me, Kate. I need your mouth on me. Make me climax on your tongue."

Kate pulled her head away from Jeri's breasts in surprise, having never heard the blonde speak like that before. Her startled eyes met Jeri's, passionate blue-grey on wild, deep blue, so dark with arousal they were almost black.

"Fuck me, Kate," Jeri whispered. "Fuck me now."

Kate made a sound in the back of her throat and lowered her lips back to Jeri's body, kissing and licking down her breasts, over her stomach until she was positioned directly in front of the wet folds. As soon as she tasted Jeri's arousal, Kate's mind was transported back four years, to that first night, when Lynn taught her what she liked. She used that knowledge now, nibbling and sucking on the folds of flesh before flattening her tongue and dragging it slowly from Jeri's entrance to the base of her clit, being careful not to touch the tip.

Kate repeated the motion a few times before circling Jeri's entrance with her tongue and pressing her nose into the base of her clit. As she entered Jeri with her tongue, she pressed her nose harder against her clit, making the younger woman gasp.

"Oh, yes, Kate..." Jeri moaned. "Oh that feels so good!"

Delicately licking the top of Jeri's entrance, Kate hummed against the flesh, causing a shudder to wrack Jeri's slim form. As Kate withdrew her tongue, she swirled it around, then entered again, this time licking the bottom of Jeri's entrance. She felt the blonde draw her fingers through her auburn hair.

Bringing one hand up, Kate rubbed her fingers softly over the smooth area between Jeri's front and rear entrances, pressing lightly. She then began to thrust her tongue in harder, still nuzzling her nose against Jeri's hardened clit.

"Oh God," Jeri gasped. "Oh God, oh God, Kate!" She hooked her legs over Kate's shoulders, bearing down on her tongue, feeling the sensations through her entire body. "God, Kate, yes, fuck me!"

Kate started thrusting even harder with her tongue, and using more pressure with her fingers, rubbing the smooth skin. Each time Kate withdrew her tongue, she swirled it around, as if stirring Jeri, before thrusting it back in again.

"Kate!" Jeri shouted, her back arching, close, so close, to the edge.

Changing tactics, Kate withdrew her tongue again, then flattened it against Jeri's body in one long swipe from her entrance to her clit. Kate did this several more times, each time adding more pressure to her fingers against Jeri. When Jeri was quivering and moaning almost continually, Kate finally engulfed her clit at the end of her last stroke, sucking hard.

"GOD!" Jeri's head hit the cupboard as she jerked it back. "Yes! Oh fuck me, Kate, fuck me!"

Kate sucked harder on Jeri's clit, rubbing her fingers firmly against her flesh, until Jeri climaxed with a loud shriek, crying out her pleasure for all the world to hear.

"God," Jeri sighed, finally coming down from her high.

Kate slowly pulled away, standing up straight again. Now that the moment was over, she was starting to feel distinctly embarrassed, feeling as if she had just slutted herself out to someone who didn't care in the least. She didn't know what to say.

Before the moment got awkward, Jeri heard her cell phone ring. She jumped off the counter on slightly unsteady legs and walked over to where she had set her purse on the table.

"Hello?" Jeri paused, then glanced quickly at Kate, who immediately looked away, avoiding eye contact. "Jack." Another pause while Jack spoke. "No, Jack, I'm fine." Pause. "No, I just needed to get away for a little bit. I'm at an old friend's house."

Kate's mouth dropped open involuntarily. Old friend?

"Jack, I'm fine. I just left the phone inside, and we were out on the porch." Another pause. "But I just got here!" As Jack spoke again, Jeri's face became sullen. "Fine," she said shortly. Another pause. "No, Jack, I'll leave right away." Kate thought Jeri sounded distinctly displeased. "Yeah. Love you, too. Bye." She hung up and returned the phone to her purse, then turned around. She lowered her head slightly, looking at the floor. "I have to go."

Momentarily forgetting her embarrassment, Kate ask, concerned. "Jeri, is everything okay?"

"Fine."

Kate placed her hand on the younger woman's arm, then drew back as if stung when Jeri shook her off abruptly. "Jeri... don't go."

"Why not?" Jeri countered. "Jack wants me at home, and it's not like I have a reason not to leave."

Kate reacted as though slapped. "What?"

Jeri turned to face Kate. "Get over it, Kate!" she lashed out. "This is just a fuck! I'm married, and my husband wants me to be with him. I'm going."

Although she didn't notice it at the time, Kate would later remember the tears glittering in Jeri's eyes, the pain and confusion just below the surface. But for now, all she saw was the anger and fear. "Jeri..." Saying the first thing that came to mind, Kate asked, "Is your husband abusing you? Is that why you're afraid?"

"I'm not afraid! And Jack does *not* abuse me!" Jeri glared at Kate. "You have no idea what you're talking about."

Not believing Jeri in the slightest, Kate pressed the issue. "Jeri, if he is abusing you--"

Jeri cut Kate off swiftly. "I told you, he's **not** abusing me! And at least **he** loves me!" Upon shouting that, Jeri grabbed her pants and shirt, donning them as best she could given their ragged state, then grabbed her purse and stalked out the door, slamming it behind her and never once looking back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Um, the "bitch" part was said for effect, not accuracy. It was said to prove a point, and not meant how it was literally said.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Three and a half years later

Kate exited her cast-mate's trailer feeling even worse than when she had entered. Her body ached pleasantly with each step, serving to remind her just how damn far she'd fallen. She walked down the row of trailers to the end and entered hers. Walking straight to the washroom, she opened a cabinet and pulled out a tube of cooling cream. Stripping off her shirt, realizing belatedly that her bra was still in Jeri's trailer, she twisted the cap off the tube and gently rubbed the cream into her bruised nipples, hissing at the sting.

After capping the tube again and placing it back on the shelf, Kate stripped off her pants and underwear, taking stock of her body. Her wrists and ankles were red, but it was nothing that wouldn't fade by the next day. There were twin trails of bite marks up the insides of her legs and arms, luckily the week's episode didn't have Janeway in anything but her uniform. There was another bite mark on her right breast, just above the nipple. Kate could still see the teeth marks.

Brushing her hair behind her ears, Kate yelped at the sudden, unexpected pain when her pinky fingernail scratched across her right earlobe. Leaning forward to look closer in the mirror, she examined the reddened flesh and noticed a thin trail of blood, slowly following the pull of gravity from a tiny cut.

"Damn."

Well, Kate thought, maybe makeup would cover it.

Quickly dressing again, Kate grabbed her things and left her trailer, making her way across the lot to where her car was parked. She unlocked the vehicle and tossed her things inside. Just as she was about to slide into the driver's seat, a sudden weight at her back was pressing her into the smooth surface in front of her.

Hot breath slid across Kate's ear. A shiver ran through her.

"We're in public," Kate protested weakly.

"Nobody's here but us," Jeri promised, her voice low, sexy.

"We can't..."

"Do you want me to stop?" Dark. Dangerous.

Kate could hear promise in the low tone, knew her decision would affect more than the one night. "No."

"Good."

Kate moaned as Jeri's hand slid into her pants and panties, finding her already wet. "I want to see your eyes," Kate requested, already knowing the answer before she asked the question. It was always the same.

"No."

Kate vowed to herself, as she did every time she and Jeri had sex, that next time she would press the issue, make Jeri look at her. But not this time.

"Look around, Kate," Jeri said into her ear. "Tell me which office is Rick's."

Kate opened her eyes that she never realized she had closed and studied the building in front of her, finding it hard to consentrate with Jeri's fingers moving in and around her folds. "Fourth floor... third window from the -- oh God! -- right..."

"Mm-hmm," Jeri hummed. "And which is Brannon's?"

"Fourth floor... third window from the left. Oh God, Jeri, please!"

"Do you think they're still up there, Kate? Maybe they're watching us right now. Do you think so?"

"No..." Kate moaned, her eyes screwed shut again, hips rocking against Jeri's fingers.

Jeri chuckled. "But we never saw them leave, did we? We were..." she paused. "busy. Weren't we?" To remind Kate just what had occupied their time, she brought her free hand up, twisting Kate's nipple.

Kate shrieked at the sudden pain, as well as the pleasure of two of Jeri's fingers unexpectedly entering her.

Jeri set up a quick rhythm for her fingers, simultaniously rubbing her thumb alongside Kate's clit, but not touching it directly.

"Oh God, oh God..." Kate gasped, moving her hips to the rhythm Jeri had set, her head tilted forward, resting on her crossed arms atop the car. "Oh yes... God, Jeri."

Jeri thrust her hips against Kate's backside, stimulating herself as she thrust into Kate with her fingers. "Should I make you climax, Kate?" Jeri asked, her voice husky with desire. "Right here, right in the open, in the parking lot?"

"Oh yes," Kate breathed, grinding her ass into Jeri.

"Why?" Jeri demanded.

Kate paused, her head swimming with the sensations within her, unable to come up with an answer. Finally she remembered, she knew what her reply had to be. "Because... I need it..."

"Oh you do?" Jeri asked. "You need it? Need me?"

"Yes!" Kate shouted, in answer or ecstasy, it was unclear, as Jeri's thumb brushed over the tip of her clit.

"Good," Jeri moaned, her eyes sliding closed. She opened her eyes again with effort. "Then come for me, Kate. Right here, right now," she whispered, rubbing her thumb harder over Kate's clit.

Kate choked off a cry in her throat, the sound coming out as a whimper. She began thrusting her hips harder against Jeri, close to orgasm.

"Come, Kate," Jeri said, her voice suddenly soft, loving. She nuzzled the older woman's ear gently. Her fingers thrust harder. "Come for me, please."

"Oh God!" Kate cried, stiffening, shuddering with her climax, panting. "Oh God," she said quieter, once her body calmed some.

Jeri continued nuzzling Kate's ear and neck. "I love you," she whispered. Slowly extracting her hand from Kate's body and clothing, feeling her tremble as she did, Jeri turned Kate around to face her, wrapping her arms around her. Burying her face in Kate's neck, Jeri clung to her, suddenly trembling even more than Kate was. "Oh God, Kate, I love you so much."

"Shhhh," Kate soothed, running her hands up and down Jeri's spine. "I know, my darling. I know. I love you. It's all right."

Jeri pulled back, sniffling slightly, her eyes and eyelashes wet with barely restrained tears. "I have to go. Alex."

Kate nodded. "Tomorrow," she promised. Jeri nodded. "Jeri?" Kate called, just as Jeri started to move away. The blonde turned back just in time for Kate to wrap her arms around the blonde's neck and kiss her both passionately and lovingly.

Smiling as she pulled away, Jeri mouthed "love you" once more before walking to her car.

Kate watched the other woman drive away before getting in her own car and starting home. Thoughts raced across her mind the entire way.

_Why do I do this to myself? Time and again I say I'm going to change this. To walk away._

_But God..._

_I can't walk away from her. I sent her away twice, I can't do that again._

Kate sighed, lifting a hand from the wheel to run through her hair.

_She tells me that she loves me. She promises to always love me. But does she? Does she really, in her heart and mind and soul? It doesn't seem like it._

_God I hope she does. I love her so much... I don't know what I would do if this wasn't real to her._

Suddenly Kate felt a surge of anger, directed, not at Jeri, but herself.

_I can't believe I'm such a fucking idiot! I can't believe I need her so much that I stay with her! She doesn't love me! God, all she sees me as is a fuck! Someone she can get to do anything, someone who turns to a pleading, aroused **slave** just from a look or light touch!_

_God..._

_I'm her slut. I'm her fucking **slut** and I fucking **like** it!_

Kate slammed one hand against the wheel, accidentally hitting the horn, which let out a loud blast. The person in the car next to her honked back, and when Kate looked over, the man lifted one finger in the universal "fuck you" gesture. Kate sighed and went back to her thoughts.

_Why the hell do I keep going back to her? It's the same every damn time._

_We meet, we kiss a couple times, we fuck, we leave our separate ways. End of story._

Kate let out a growl.

_The story's shit._

_And yet, I keep telling myself I'm going to rewrite the story. I keep telling myself that_ next time _whenever that is, I'll finally get her to look me in the eye._

_God, why does she avoid my eyes, anyway?_

_Even when we come as close to making love as we ever do... she never looks at me. It's like she's not even there._

Kate frowned at that thought.

_Is she there? When I touch her she reacts in body, but not in soul. She never tells me while we have sex that she loves me, only before and after. She does things I remember her saying years ago that she would **never** do._

_She's... changed._

_I don't know her anymore._

_And yet I love her._

Kate shook her head.

_I am completely fucked up._


	4. Chapter 4

Kate sighed softly, thinking that she was in the closest thing to heaven there ever was. She and Jeri had been entwined together in the couch in Jeri's trailer for the better part of an hour, murmuring endearments and declarations of love and exchanging sweet caresses.

"I love you, Kate," Jeri whispered for at least the tenth time that evening, pressing her lips lightly to Kate's in a loving kiss.

"Mm, love you, too," Kate mumbled.

Running her hand languidly up and down Kate's back, Jeri said, "I love being with you, holding you, touching you. You're everything to me, Kate."

Kate hummed in her throat, pulling herself slightly out of her contentment induced stupor. She looked up at Jeri's face, seeing the love shining in her eyes. She smiled. "You're everything to me as well, my darling. I love you more than words can say."

Jeri kissed Kate again, this time lingering, inserting a bit of passion into the contact.

Kate moaned into the kiss, even as her mind raced, wondering whether she really wanted to let Jeri turn this into yet another mindless sexual encounter. As Jeri kissed her again, even more passionately, Kate gave up the argument in her mind. Of course she would let Jeri escalate the encounter. For the same reason she did every time. She wanted Jeri. She _needed_ Jeri.

The kisses and caresses intensified until suddenly Jeri pulled away, standing up and walking into the bathroom. It took a second for Kate to realize Jeri had left.

"Jeri?" Kate called, confused.

Jeri came back out of the bathroom, her hands behind her back, smirking. "I bought something yesterday, for us to try."

Kate raised her eyebrow. "Oh?"

Bringing her hands back around in front of her, Jeri showed Kate what she held. A dildo and harness.

Jeri sauntered back up to Kate, leaned down, and said seductively, "I want to fuck you," enunciating the words clearly.

Kate shuddered with excitement and no little amount of apprehension. Then suddenly Jeri was at her, pulling clothing off, kissing, nipping and licking her skin, arousing her beyond measure. Soon they were both naked, and on the floor, although Kate had no idea when that had happened. Kate was laying on the carpet on her stomach, Jeri on top of her, pressing her down as she kissed and nibbled at the back of her neck.

When Jeri pulled away, and Kate heard her strapping the harness around her waist and thighs, she glanced over her shoulder. Kate couldn't deny that there was something infinitely arousing about seeing a fully erect, mostly natural looking penis jutting forward from Jeri's very feminine body.

Jeri leaned over Kate again, looking at the carpet as she spoke. "I want you on your hands and knees."

Scrambling to comply, Kate propped herself up, trembling slightly with anticipation. She felt Jeri's fingers against her wet folds, spreading the moisture around, gauging whether or not the older woman was wet enough. Apparently she was, because seconds later Kate felt herself stretching as Jeri slowly entered her.

"Oh God," Kate breathed, pressing her hips back to welcome the intrusion. Once Jeri was all the way in, Kate moaned, feeling fuller than she ever had, with any other lover before.

Jeri quickly set up a smooth motion of her hips, thrusting in and out of Kate, her hands resting on Kate's hips.

"You like me fucking you, don't you, Kate?" Jeri growled, squeezing Kate's hips, leaving a momentary impression of her hands against the smooth skin.

Kate didn't answer, her eyes closed, mind varying between how degrading being in this position felt, and how good it felt.

Jeri stopped her movement suddenly, causing Kate to let out a protesting sound. She leaned forward and wrapped her right arm around Kate's hips, keeping her in place. Her other arm she reached up, tangling her fingers in Kate's hair, pulling her head back.

"Answer me, Kate," Jeri said, her voice low. "I'm not going to continue until you beg me to fuck you." Jeri paused, Kate didn't reply. "Let me hear to beg, Kate!" Jeri exclaimed, her voice getting louder.

 _I'll beg when you look me in the eye_ , Kate thought, opening her eyes and looking over her shoulder. Out of the corner of her eye she saw Jeri turn her head away from hers.

Jeri's eyes narrowed as Kate stayed silent. She twisted her hips slightly, reminding Kate of the fullness within her, causing her to gasp. "Beg me, Kate."

"No," Kate moaned, still looking at the side of Jeri's face.

Jeri let go of Kate's hair and ran her fingers down her back, teasing. "You'll beg me," Jeri promised, still looking to the side. "I'm going to torment you until you do, Kate."

 _God, I should just pull away now_ , Kate thought. _I won't beg her. I won't beg her for something I don't even really want._

Jeri continued speaking, "I'm going to touch you and drive you crazy." To prove the statement, Jeri brought her free hand to Kate's breast, tweaking the nipple.

"Oh God..." _Fuck, fuck, fuck!_

"You like it when I play with your nipples, don't you, Kate? You like it when I pinch them, don't you?" Jeri pinched the nipple that was between her fingers.

Kate moaned, pressing her chest toward the sensation. _God, Jeri, just look at me_ , Kate mentally sighed, not bothering to voice the request, but still willing the younger woman to comply.

"I'm going to fuck you, Kate. I'm gonna fuck you so hard you'll still feel it tomorrow night. Do you want that?" Jeri taunted, still manipulating Kate's nipple between her fingers.

Kate took a chance, moaning, "Yes." _What the fuck are you saying, Kate?! You hate it when Jeri gets like this, you know that!_

"Then beg me, Kate. Beg me to fuck you!"

"No." _God, I want her so much. Even like this, I want her..._ Kate mentally shook her head. _No, I don't want her like this... I do want her, but not like this... Never like this..._

Jeri slid her hand down Kate's stomach and between her legs, flicking a finger over her clit.

"God!" Kate shrieked, not expecting the touch, shuddering.

"Beg me, Kate!" Jeri demanded. "Beg me to fuck you!" She continued to move her finger around Kate's clit, but not touching it directly again.

Kate began to squirm against Jeri's restraining arm. _I may not want her like this,_ Kate thought, struck by realization, _but I need her._ "Please," she said, so quietly Jeri barely heard. Barely.

"Please what?" Jeri asked, her voice slightly softer, less demanding. She flicked across Kate's clit again.

"Please!"

"Please what?" Jeri repeated, her voice hardening again.

Kate let out a sobbing breath. "Fuck me! Please, Jeri, God, please, fuck me!" Her head lowered, no longer trying to catch Jeri's eyes.

Jeri smiled slowly, retracting her arm from around Kate's hips and withdrawing slightly before thrusting in again, still moving her finger around Kate's clit. She started to thrust firmly, quickly, her moving hips and finger quickly, bringing Kate to a screaming, shattering orgasm, her own smaller climax causing her to cry out quietly.

Kate lay on the floor of Jeri's trailer, a trembling puddle, shivering from the strength of her climax and the pleasure that still coursed through her at the slightest movement. Jeri, after carefully pulling out of Kate and quickly shedding the strap-on, gathered Kate into her arms, murmuring endearments into her hair.

"Oh, Kate," Jeri breathed. "God, I love you." She pressed soft kisses to Kate's face, her eyes, forehead, cheeks, nose, lips, chin, murmuring "I love you's" the whole time.

As Kate became more aware of her surroundings, she felt something wet on her face and looked up, seeing tears streak Jeri's cheeks. She reached up with a trembling hand, brushing away the tears. "What's wrong?" Kate asked softly, her voice hoarse.

Jeri sniffed. "I love you so much," she said plaintively. "I don't know how to tell you!"

Kate shifted slightly, wrapping her arms around Jeri. "Shh, darling," she murmured. "You don't have to tell me. I know. I love you just as much."

Pulling Kate closer, Jeri nestled against her, crying softly.

***

Kate lay in bed, shifting slightly, still pulsing from earlier that night in Jeri's trailer. The blonde wasn't kidding when she said Kate would still feel it the next day -- she knew she would.

Just as Kate started to drift off into sleep, a stray thought crossed her mind and she sat up, her eyes wide. Her hand scrambled for the switch on her bedside lamp, then soft light flooded the room. Kate could see her reflection in her vanity mirror, her slightly disarrayed auburn hair and shocked blue grey eyes.

"Submission," she mumbled. _That's what it is. The more I submit to Jeri..._

_Damn._

Kate sighed, working things out as she watched her reflection.

_The harder she is in sex... the more she pushes... the rougher it is, the more raw it is, the more... desperate... it is..._

_The more loving she is._

Her reflection dipped its head slightly.

_The harder the act, the softer the response._

Her reflection brought its head back up, let out a soundless sigh that echoed Kate's loud one, then dropped from sight as Kate lay back down.

 _But can I continue this? Tonight..._ Kate's thoughts trailed off for a moment.

_Tonight was too much. Too hard. Too rough. Too raw. Too desperate._

_Too damned degrading._

She studied the patterns the lamp threw on the ceiling.

_I can't do this anymore. My need be damned, I **won't** do this anymore._


	5. Chapter 5

Kate raised her face to the sun, sighing as she felt its warmth caress her face. Normally such a simply pleasure would make her smile, but today she just lowered her face again and opened her eyes, gazing sadly across the length of her backyard. A movement in the corner of her eye caught her attention, and she turned her head, stunned and angry to see Jeri walking toward her. Kate scrambled to her feet, meeting Jeri near the corner of the pool.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Kate asked, glaring at the blonde.

Jeri glared right back. "Why the hell haven't you answered my calls?" she shot back.

"What does it matter?"

"Why the fuck are you avoiding me!" Jeri suddenly yelled, anger and hurt evident in her voice.

Kate felt a twinge of regret, but firmly clamped down on it. Now was not the time to back down. "What makes you think that I am?"

Jeri shook her head, letting out a breath. "Don't toy with me, Kate. You've been ignoring my calls, every time I go to your trailer someone else is there with you, you never come to my trailer... what's going on?"

"Has it ever occurred to you, Jeri, that I have needs and wants, too?"

"What?" Jeri asked, baffled.

"I'm talking about us. I need more, Jeri. I want more. I don't want to be your fuck. I love you, God knows I love you, but I need more than you can give me."

Jeri shook her head. "I can give you whatever you need, Kate!"

Kate smiled sadly. "No, Jeri, you can't."

"Just tell me what you want, Kate," Jeri said. "And I'll make it happen. More time together, somewhere other than our trailers, variation, anything! Just **tell** me!"

"God, Jeri, I'm not talking about sex!" Kate started stalking around, feeling energy build up within her and needing to let it out. "Everything we had in the past was just sex. That's fine, I never expected anything more. But God, Jeri, I'm not your slut! Sex isn't everything, dammit!"

"I know that!" Jeri protested. "I'm not saying that it is, but--"

Kate cut her off, "Then why are you so damned preoccupied with it?! Name one time we've done something together, romantically, where sex not only didn't come into play, but wasn't the damned objective!"

Jeri opened her mouth, then closed it abruptly. "That's not the point," she hissed.

"That's **exactly** the point!" Kate flailed her arms around. "If sex wasn't the damn reason we're together, this might go somewhere! But as it is, all we're destined for, as a couple, is sexual release and emotional loneliness!"

"That's not true!" Jeri was starting to panic, seeing everything slipping away from her.

Kate gazed at Jeri with sad eyes. "It is," she said softly. "It's over, Jeri." She shrugged. "Maybe it never was." Turning from the other woman, she said, "I think you should leave." She walked away a few feet, resting her hand on the ladder up to the diving board.

Jeri walked up to Kate again. "You know you can't send me away again, Kate," she murmured. "You know you can't give me up, you can't give up what I can give you." She started to run her hand down Kate's back, but Kate pulled away.

"No, Jeri! I don't want this, I don't want _you_ like this! Not anymore!"

Jeri pinned Kate against the ladder, holding her in place and grinding against her lightly. "You want this as much as I do! You need me, Kate, you need me to fuck you!"

Kate struggled against Jeri, at a decided disadvantage, facing the ladder, her back to the other woman. "No! Dammit, get off of me!"

"No one has ever fucked you the way I have," Jeri growled, nipping Kate's earlobe. "And no one ever will."

Kate's temper immediately flared, and she suddenly lashed out at Jeri, managing to set her off balance, enabling the older woman to pull away. Then suddenly Jeri was back at her, her hands rough as they ran over her body. Kate alternated between pushing Jeri's hands away and touching her, wanting, needing Jeri to lose control for once.

One of them tripped, pulling the other with her unto the pool deck. They landed on their sides, and Jeri rolled on top of Kate, pinning her down. Kate manged to roll them over, her now on top. They rolled back and forth, each fighting for dominance, each willing the other to submit. Somewhere along the way their clothes were pull off, and they rubbed against each other, naked.

Kate squirmed against Jeri, managing to get her hand between their bodies, then between Jeri's legs, thrusting into her. Jeri cried out, and brought her own hand into play, mirroring Kate's, and entering the older woman. They thrust hard, each trying to force the other to orgasm first, to surrender first. They continued to roll around the deck, first one atop, then the other, in their fight.

Noticing the Jeri's eyes were yet again closed in their sexual encounter, Kate's anger went up another notch. "Look at me, Jeri," she ground out, her eyes burning and fixed on the blonde's.

"No," Jeri replied, her voice equally hard.

"Fucking look at me!" Kate screamed.

"No!" Jeri screamed back, although in reply, or in a hopeless attempt to stop the orgasm that was suddenly consuming her body, neither knew. In a last-ditch effort to escape her failure at getting Kate to submit to her, Jeri forcefully shoved Kate off of her, not realizing how close they were to the edge of the pool.

Her own climax running through her body, Kate couldn't react fast enough, and didn't even have time to cry out as her head hit the side of the pool, and a moment later the cool water enveloped her. Fear flashed through her and she gasped, inhaling water.

It took Jeri a moment to realize that the arm she had flung in Kate's direction was hanging off the edge of the pool, and when she did notice, she quickly turned, careful not to roll into the pool. Looking down, she saw Kate at the bottom of the pool, listlessly drifting.

"Oh God, Kate!" Jeri cried, jumping into the pool and swimming to the bottom. Grabbing Kate by the arm, she pull the other woman to the surface, pushing her up against the side of the pool, holding her above the water. "Kate? Oh God, Kate, answer me, please!"

Kate coughed, her head falling forward. She groaned.

"Kate? Kate!"

Lifting her head slowly, Kate opened her eyes, seeing the wide, fearful blue eyes looking back at her.

"Oh God, Kate," Jeri said, softer now as her fear started to abate. Replacing it was overwhelming shame. "Kate," she whispered.

Kate coughed again. "Help me out of the pool," she rasped.

Jeri hurried to comply, carefully lifting Kate and helping her onto the deck before levering herself out of the water.

"God, Kate, are you okay?"

Kate rubbed the back of her head where it had struck the edge of the pool and coughed once more. "Yes, I'm fine. Just surprised, not really hurt."

Jeri stared down at her hands. "I'm so sorry," she whispered. Kate didn't know what to say, and Jeri spoke again before she could think of something. "I'll go. I--I won't come back." Jeri stood, quickly throwing on her clothes, then she was gone.

For good.


	6. Chapter 6

Kate shook her head, watching Jeri from across the set. It was ironic, really. After she decided to leave Jeri, she had avoided her. Three days she avoided her before Jeri confronted her at her backyard pool. Now the opposite was occurring. Jeri stayed away from Kate, never calling, never going over to her trailer, never inviting Kate to her trailer, barely even looking at Kate unless they were doing a scene.

Now Kate was the one chasing, the one calling and having her calls ignored. Although she really did believe her decision to leave was right, she also knew that they ended very badly, Jeri almost sick with guilt at having physically hurt Kate, and Kate dazed from hitting her head on the side of the pool.

Finally, after two weeks, Kate knew that enough was enough. She had overheard Jeri talking with Roxann, and telling her that Alex was going to Chicago for the week to spend time with his father, and Kate knew Jeri would be home alone.

She pulled her car into the driveway and shut it off. Taking a deep, slow breath to quell her nerves, Kate exited the car and walked up to the door, pressing the doorbell.

The door opened, revealing Jeri, wearing grey sweat pants and a white tank, her hair pulled up into a low ponytail.

"What are you doing here?"

"We need to talk," Kate said. She motioned to the door. "Can I come in?"

"No. Talk here."

Kate sighed. "Jeri, please. Let me in."

Jeri eyed Kate uncertainly, then finally let the door swing open and the older woman pass. Kate entered the house and walked into the living room. She sat down on the couch, waiting until Jeri sat opposite her in an armchair before she spoke.

"Things don't happen as we imagine they would, do they?" She asked softly.

Jeri shrugged. "Nothing ever does. Is there a point to this?"

The corner of Kate's lips turned up in a half smile. "Jeri, I'm sorry," she whispered.

Jeri blinked. "What?"

"I'm sorry. For taking so long to tell you that I wasn't happy. For leaving with no reason, no explanation. I'm sorry for hurting you."

Her heart beating so hard she could hear it, Jeri licked her lips, and asked, gathering her courage, "What did you want from me, Kate?"

Kate met Jeri's eyes, her own eyes sad. "I just wanted you, Jeri. I wanted to be able to make love with you, to you. Just us."

"I don't understand."

"I know. I don't know why, but..." Kate sighed. "Jeri, love isn't submission. I shouldn't have to be dominated by you for you to feel that I love you."

Jeri frowned. "But..." she trailed off.

"Yes?"

"But that's how you show someone that you love them."

Kate shook her head. "No, Jeri. Sometimes, yes, people do that, but only if both people agree on that." She leaned forward. "Jeri, I show someone that I love them by being with them. Supporting them. Being there for them. It doesn't have anything to do with sex, but if it did, I would show my love by making love with them. Give and take."

"I still don't understand," Jeri whispered, looking down at her hands.

Kate paused, thinking. Finally coming to a decision, she asked softly, "Will you let me show you?"

Jeri's head jerked up, wide eyes meeting Kate's. " _What?_ "

"Please, Jeri? Let me make love to you."

Jeri chewed lightly on her lower lip. "All right," she said slowly.

Jeri led Kate to her bedroom, shutting the door behind them, shutting the world out.

"I'm nervous," Jeri admitted in a whisper.

"I know," Kate whispered back. "So am I."

Kate reached up and pulled Jeri to her, kissing her in a slow, sweet melding of lips. When they parted Kate smiled, then kissed her again, keeping the kisses slow and lazy and very loving. Finally moving from Jeri's lips, Kate lightly kissed along her jaw line, up to her ear, down her neck, leaving kisses on every available inch of skin.

When Jeri finally moaned, the sound quiet and sweet, Kate escalated her movements again, pulling Jeri's top off and leaving kisses over the skin revealed. She murmured, "Take your hair down," against Jeri's stomach, and felt the muscles move slightly as Jeri lifted her arms and pulled the elastic from her hair.

Kate stood back up straight, running her fingers through Jeri's hair, soothing her. "I love you," Kate whispered, her eyes pinned to Jeri's. Jeri immediately glanced away. Kate let her.

They kissed again, soft and sweet, and Kate could sense Jeri fighting against her urge to turn the kiss torrid. Jeri moaned into Kate's mouth and Kate moaned back, then unclasped Jeri's bra and cupped her breasts in her hands, feeling the nipples harden.

Jeri moaned again and Kate broke the kiss to trail down to Jeri's breasts, covering them in light kisses. She felt Jeri's fingers in her hair, a presence, carefully undemanding. Kate knew, by the way that Jeri was being so careful, that she was viewing thsi as a submission to Kate, but she hoped that Jeri's mind would soon be changed.

Kate knelt in front of Jeri, slipping the blonde's sweats off, kissing her hips, lower stomach, thighs. Jeri moaned again. Kate backed up, standing, then stripped off her own t-shirt and jeans, letting them fall to the floor, followed by her bra and panties. Naked, she stepped back up to Jeri, then knelt again, slowly sliding Jeri's own panties off, kissing the thatch of dark blonde curls.

"Kate..." Whispered. Pleading.

"I love you," Kate whispered back again, and led Jeri to the bed, coaxing her with her hands to lay down on her back.

Crawling over Jeri, Kate kissed her again and ran one hand over her body, caressing her breasts, stomach, hips, thighs. Jeri gasped when one finger dipped between her thighs, parting wet folds. Kate moved her fingers slowly around Jeri's folds, as if memorizing her sex.

"God, Kate, please," Jeri sobbed, arching her hips, trying to force Kate to enter her.

"Shh," Kate soothed. "Soon, darling." She bent her head down and sucked lightly on Jeri's nearest nipple, then pulled away, entering the blonde with one finger at the same time.

"God!" Jeri cried, tossing her head to the side, moaning.

"Look at me, Jeri," Kate whispered, thrusting her finger slowly.

Jeri shook her head.

Kate added another finger, feeling Jeri clench around her, rubbing her thumb alongside the other woman's clit.

"Please, Jeri. God, please look at me."

Jeri paused, no answering, but not opening her eyes, either. Her hips thrust against Kate's hand as she neared orgasm.

A tear dripped onto Jeri's cheek. "Jeri, please," Kate begged. "Please, please, look at me. Please." Her voice broke on the last word.

Slowly Jeri's eyes opened and she turned her head to Kate's wary and afraid of what she might see in the older woman's eyes. The pure love residing in the blue-grey depths surprised Jeri. The love that blocked out all the pain Jeri had caused, everything Jeri had said and done.

As Jeri finally let herself know that Kate truly loved her, as she finally looked in her eyes, finally **saw** her love, her body convulsed, reaching its peak in languid waves, carrying pleasure and love, overwhelming Jeri.

When Jeri came back to reality, she was wrapped up in Kate's embrace, tears running down both of their cheeks.

"I didn't know," Jeri whispered, meeting Kate's gaze.

"I know," Kate whispered back. "I know. It's all right. I love you."

Jeri shook her head. "I always thought..." she sighed.

"Take your time, darling. I'm here."

Deciding to explain from roughly the beginning, Jeri said quietly, "Jack always made me submit to him. He made me do things I didn't want to do, told me that it made me a better lover. That I should like it, it was normal to like it. He told me that I would do it willingly if I really loved him. I did love him," she protested. "I did. But things started to change, get kinky. I hated it, and I told him that. He accused me of not loving him."

Kate tightened her hold on Jeri, trying to protect her from the hurt her husband caused.

"I finally got used to the other stuff. I started to... embrace it. I felt safe when I submitted to him, I felt like it was the only way I could show him that I loved him. Then when I fell in love with you..." Jeri's voice broke, the tears started again, falling faster now.

"When I fell in love with you, I took Jack's place. I thought that the only way I could feel your love was to have you submit to me. I did everything to you that he did to me. I did everything to you that I hated him doing to me. I'm so sorry," she whispered.

Kate shook her head. "It's all right, Jeri. I understand. I forgive you." She paused. "There's one thing I don't understand, though."

"What?"

"Why wouldn't you look at me?"

"I--I don't know," Jeri stammered. "I was afraid."

"Of what?"

Jeri shrugged. "Your love?" she suggested. "I've never known a love that wasn't dominating as well."

"Are you still afraid?"

Thinking about that for a moment, Jeri replied, "A little."

Kate shifted to look into Jeri's eyes. "Will you run away again?" she asked seriously.

Jeri shook her head. "No. Never."

Smiling, Kate kissed Jeri, sealing the promise.

"Kate?" Jeri asked after they parted.

"Yes?"

Jeri smirked softly. "I want to make love to you."

Kate smiled back and moved to roll Jeri on top of her when Jeri stopped her. "No. I want to look up at you." Kate blushed slightly, almost shy, but infinitely pleased, as Jeri had never wanted Kate above her before.

They made love slowly, savoring the feel of each other's bodies, spending the rest of the day and the whole night together in bed, relearning their bodies, and learning for the first time what each of them liked.

The next day they went out together, spending the entire day shopping and visiting art galleries, enjoying each other's company.

The road to Jeri's healing wasn't an easy one, and more than once she fell back into her old habits, but with Kate's love and support, she pulled back from what she had known, and together they learned what the truest of loves was.

**Author's Note:**

> As I had an extremely clear vision of who Jeri was and how she viewed love and sex, I'm somewhat afraid that it didn't all make it to the pages of the story. Therefore if there are any questions, just post them and I'll answer :)
> 
> I'm sure we've all heard the divorce scandal re: Jeri and Jack's divorce. Although I didn't realize it at the time of writing this story, it later became clear to me that this was very much based on that. My reasoning being that a guy doesn't just up and decide to take his wife to a sex club out of the blue. There had to have been something, whether Jeri realized it for what it was or not, that led up to it.
> 
> Beyond that, there had to have been some effect on Jeri herself. She has said that she was very self-conscious and such, which I believe is a result of the verbal abuse she suffered in her marriage, but I also think that there's probably some kind of sexual issue that she has. I'm not in any way saying it's what's written in this story, but this is just how it came out as I wrote it.


End file.
